


What You Destroy

by JackedofSpades



Category: Imperial Radch Series - Ann Leckie
Genre: Anaander Backstory Fic, Angst, Battle of Iait II, Canon Typical Violence, F/F, Gen, Original Radch Interpretation, Other, Sphene Origin Story, canon typical language, no presger tho, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-04-18
Packaged: 2019-04-24 12:57:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14355999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JackedofSpades/pseuds/JackedofSpades
Summary: My entry for the Republic of Two Systems Independence Day Exchange 2018!My person was vass! They asked for a few things, but one of them was "Something about Anaander" and some suggestions with Naskaaia or possibly Anaander's memoirs. I sort of folded this into a weird tragedy telling of Anaander's teenage years and the events that led to Anaander's reign.It's sad! And Sphene's here too!Hope you like it.





	What You Destroy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [vass](https://archiveofourown.org/users/vass/gifts).



_Betrayer!_

Anaander leaned on her arm, chin tucked down as she stared out the window of her family’s pleasure yacht, _Entirety of the Whole_. Her eyes scanned the docking platforms, the closest military vessel an unfinished Notai warship. It was one of the gems, the flashes of welding burn within the construction membrane made the thing sparkle, the bow storage decks sealed while the stern was still entirely stripped out in the lower decks, hollow, not yet fitted with its AI core or engines.

“Much like our relationship, don’t you think?” Naskaaia gestured out the window as she sidled into the room, her gait languid and cocksure, as if she were drunk. Anaander knew better.

“You’re comparing it to a gem? A treasure? Then yes.” Anaander did not spare her a look, only turned over her plan in her mind again. For the thousandth time, it seemed, checking it over for flaws. It wasn’t the only thing that mattered, but it was the most important. She had to remember that, even if Naskaaia didn’t understand.

“That’s _Sphene_ ,” Naskaaia said, gesturing clumsily out the window again. “My great-aunt’s daughter will be Captain. I might take a position on it. They offered me a lieutenancy. Not that that matters, to _you_.”

Anaander sighed, tucked her legs up under her to feint hurt. She simpered slightly, just enough for Naskaaia to catch it in profile. “Oh no, I don’t care about anything but myself, isn’t that right?”

“It is.”

“Then why are you even here?”

Naskaaia’s eyes narrowed, artificially emerald green, her gaze was too sharp to be dulled by alcohol. She stood and took quick and even steps across the room until she loomed over Anaander. At 67, she was not only Anaander’s oldest friend and lover, but the only one who had stayed out of affection and not fear or ambition. The only one who would always come back, after each fight. Anaander loved her dearly, and smiled at the look of disgust Naskaaia gave her as she did.

“You killed her. Admit it.”

“You’ll have to be specific?”

“Oh don’t start this shit. Now that Belanur is dead, the Notai are down a seat. You’ll submit yourself as a candidate for Head of the Core Council, which you will win, undoubtedly, and then you’ll strip the Notai of their rights to vote. Then of everything else, I imagine, just for the hell of it.”

“It’s not that simple, my love.”

“Does its complexity make it ethical? Forgive me my inability to see or care about your ends.”

“I do forgive you. And you will see, very soon.”

 Naskaaia sneered and pulled the ring off of her finger as tears welled in her eyes. She threw it at Anaander, who caught it in an inhumanly quick, fluid motion. Anaander tilted her head in acquiescence, the white bloom of Amaat’s Anointed on her temple shimmering just under her skin in the light.

“I’m leaving. You can sort this mess out without me.”

Naskaaia turned on her heel and stormed out of the room, towards the tiny shuttle bay. Anaander held the ring up, turning it over to check it for damage. Finding it unscathed, she pressed it to her lips, and then slid it on her own bare finger.

 

_Long ago we promised_

 

“I’ll be taking the aptitudes soon,” Naskaaia said. Her tone was casual, but Anaander could read the tension in her body, how she tensed when Anaander pulled her closer. “I don’t feel ready. What if I do badly?”

Anaander smiled with the kind of arrogance only a sixteen year old could muster and said, “You’re not supposed to be ready. If you were, it would defeat the purpose. The point is to assess you raw and unmolded.”

Naskaaia reached out and smacked Anaander in the arm and turned in Anaander’s arms to face her. “Oh, I’m so sure. Must be easy for you, having gotten a perfect score.”

“I told you, I cheated.”

“You can’t cheat at the aptitudes,” Naskaaia said, rolling her eyes. “That would be like tricking Amaat.”

“Yes; it was tricky, but I did manage that too.”

Naskaaia folded her arms on Anaander’s chest and pillowed her head on her arms, looking up with a dubious expression. “Don’t say that, knowing you, you actually did find a way.”

“I don’t like doing what I’m told.”

“ _That_ , I know.”

Anaander grinned, and Naskaaia gave in, leaning forward to kiss her. She settled into Anaander’s neck, her fingers tracing her lover’s collarbone idly. Anaander could feel her tension ease, and she said, “I listen to you, though.”

“You do,” Naskaaia admitted, sighing with contentment. They laid there together, Naskaaia working on her poetry, Anaander writing code in one eye, slicing into House Mianaai’s genetic vault on Amaat’s upper-creche database in the other.

“Just promise me one thing,” Naskaaia said, sometime later.

“Anything.”

“When you are Head of the Core Council and have the favor of every family in the Radch, you will not forget about me.”

Anaander tsked, genuinely offended. “Naskaaia, I could not live without you. It might take me a few more years, but once I overthrow useless Anlin and get the twins on my side, I’ll petition for Primacy of the house and make you my First Consort.”

Naskaaia sighed, rolling the ring Anaander had given her on her finger, though she smiled as she did. “I couldn’t care less about all that.” Anaander balked, and Naskaaia shushed her. “But of course I would accept! I only mean… that is what you want. All that I want is for us to be together, and for you to be happy, instead of your mind always racing. Scheming. Amaat made us to be happy; it is meant to decide things, and we are meant to enjoy them.”

Anaander stilled, and nodded solemnly as to appear genuine. “I am happy. And we already _are_ together.”

Naskaaia tried to keep the doubt out of her smile. “I know, but I am not your only love. Your ambition is as much your lover as I am.”

Anaander shook her head but smiled. “You are stressed, because of the aptitudes, and comparing yourself to me, needlessly.”

Naskaaia began to protest, but Anaander added, “You are far better than me, in all the ways that truly count, and that is why I love you. You will do well, and if you do not, I will destroy the evidence and replace it with anything you like.”

Naskaaia gestured harsh dismissal. “You’ll do no such thing. Promise me you won’t edit any of my data after the test.”

Anaander closed the tab to her coding in her vision, and Naskaaia’s private medical and academic file directory appeared in its place.

 “I promise.”

 

_To exchange equally, gift for gift._

 

Anaander knelt before the altar, not bothering to hide her smug grin.

She had stolen her sisters’ birthrights, the two twins whose own father was about to anoint Anaander before Amaat itself. Anteleran and Anmet sat to the side, arms and legs crossed in mirror poses, their identical expressions sour. Anaander could barely believe she used to be jealous of them, used to wish she looked like them, acted like them. Now they would feel envy, and the vengeance of their _little Anaan._

And then of course their eldest sister Anlin was here too, nervous and weak, looking as if she only wished the inevitable would come and go already. She had abdicated Primacy before Anaander had even bothered to petition for it. It hadn’t even been a challenge, and Anaander only felt pity for their mother, and only then for the wasted years she had spent grooming her, instead of Anaander.

But her mother was beaming now; flighty and self-indulgent Ankankerete Mianaai sat in her best silks, a pair of bright red gloves on her hands. They were ostentatious and tacky, and Anaander was glad she had worn them. It would give her a good laugh when the other Houses copied her ludicrous fashion at the celebration dinner tomorrow evening, looking ridiculous and unable to use any of their biometrics without clumsily pulling them off.

High Priest of Amaat, Seluin Quyeit, stood before Anaander, her arms outstretched to hush the crowd, the collection of Primaries that represented the Core Council as well as their heirs. She held out a hand to Anaander and guided her to the altar table. Anaander disrobed, naked as she stood before the massive crystalline interface of the hall. She wasn’t nervous, even as could feel Amaat’s eyes on her, judging her, weighing her.

Seluin stood at the head of the table and asked Anaander, “Who have you selected, to share this moment?”

She tensed. It was hard to say if Naskaaia planned to follow through on her threat to not appear. It was the final gambit, and she needed Naskaaia to succeed. After this last trial, she would finally have everything she needed. She would be able to control anything, after this obtaining this last piece. “Naskaaia Eskur, my First Consort and Primary of House Eskur.”

Anaander laid down on the table, hands flat on either side of the cold metal. She couldn’t move her head from where she laid, couldn’t see for herself if Naskaaia approached. She opened an interface in her vision and sliced into her sister Anmet’s vision. She was watching pornography with one eye, which almost made Anaander laugh aloud. She quickly switched to Anlin’s and caught sight of Naskaaia, approaching the altar in a simple long-sleeve tunic, her long auburn hair tied back in a tight braid, carrying a white cotton sheet in her outstretched arms.

Naskaaia approached the altar and gave one end of the sheet to Seluin. Her expression was curt and serious, and she did not look at Anaander as she and Seluin draped the sheet over Anaander’s genitals and thighs. Then she and Seluin took their positions, on either side of Anaander’s head.

“Do you consent to this joining, and to the burden and great gift of being one of Amaat’s Anointed?”

“I do,” Anaander said evenly.

“Exalted Amaat, do you judge this one of your creation, Clean and Pure of intent to serve humanity Justly? To act as your eyes, your hands, in times of crisis and great need?”

No answer came, and all assembled looked behind the altar, to the crystalline glass that framed the scene. They waited, and then the glass split and folded, sheets of crystal blooming like petals until a small niche was revealed, a small tray sitting on single shelf within it. Anaander sighed with relief, though only Naskaaia had seen it. Seluin approached and retrieved the tray and placed it near Anaander’s head on the altar.

Several tools lay on the tray, thin and sterile implements, and a single thin, threaded object with a central core shaped like a flower.

“Naskaaia, please apply the anesthetic,” Seluin said as she handed her a needle from the tray. Naskaaia reached forward and fumbled the needle, her hand faltering as it dropped. She reached with her other hand and recovered it, switching it back into her dominant hand. She gave Seluin a sheepish grin and quickly administered the drug.

Silently, Anaander’s blood ran cold as she realized what Naskaaia had done. Her forearm tensed, and Naskaaia reached out to grip her hand, her other arm cradling Anaander’s head and shoulders in the customary pose. Anaander was limp, muscles unresponsive as Naskaaia turned her head towards her for Seluin to make the first incision.

The pain was blinding, white-hot and immediate. She looked up at Naskaaia’s controlled gaze, her emerald eyes focused and her expression as smug as Anaander’s had been only minutes before.

Anaander steeled herself for the entire procedure, silently thankful that Naskaaia had at least incapacitated her enough that she was incapable of screaming. She grit her teeth, her head tilted in such a way that she could only see Naskaaia’s hand in hers. She was thankful too, that Naskaaia had taken to wearing the ring she had given her again. The sight of it kept her from blacking out.

 

_Take this curse:_

 

“I’m going to fucking _kill_ her.”

Anaander’s decoy had worked. The main Notai Fleet had been pulled out of position; lead into a trap by Anteleran and Anmet Mianaai, captaining _Crimson Beginning_ and _Revenant Altruism_ near the boundary of Radch space. Behind the fleet, Anaander had hidden a support fleet in the rings of Iait II. General Arit Nenkur had predicted the maneuver and effectively saved the main fleet from total destruction by flanking the support fleet.

What she didn’t predict was Anaander’s willingness to sacrifice her sisters, or that they would be willing to die. Nor did she know how Anaander had been able to issue them new orders with the Notai jamming their comms.

Naskaaia had been alerted by her great-aunt as she engaged at Iait II. She was the only one who could track Anaander, and her great-aunt knew it. But she hadn’t expected that she would give her the emergency command codes and temporary Captaincy of a small Notai fighter with a crew of ten, _Clarity VVS1_.

“You’re the only one who has a chance. If you’re willing, I want you to find her and force her to agree to a ceasefire while we regroup. She’s already taken out several ships, and the causalities are... I’ve never seen this much destruction, and I have no idea where she got this firepower.”

Her great-aunt’s tone had been grave, and she wouldn’t have lied. Naskaaia was shaken to the core, not because she couldn’t believe what she was hearing, but because she could. She took a shuttle, making her way upwell from Iait I to Iait Station, General Arit expediting her travel and docking priority along the way.

When she disembarked from the shuttle, she ran at full tilt down the loading dock to Gate 4 where _Clarity VVS1_ was docked, pushing aside evacuees who were attempting to board the shuttle she had just exited.

_My dear, I really wish you wouldn’t do that._

Naskaaia stopped dead in her tracks, reading the message in her vision twice. She caught her breath, and then yelled out loud, “Where are you?”

_Stay put, and you’ll be safe. I’ll come for you after, like I promised._

“Aunt Arit said you destroyed seven Notai ships and three Radchaai ones. How? _Why_? Anaander people are _dying_.”

_Only because they won’t listen to me, their rightful ruler. The measure was passed, unanimously. I have Amaat’s blessing. Hell, I have Amaat._

Around her, people were staring, terrified by Naskaaia’s claim that ten ships had been destroyed. Ten meters away at Gate 4’s platform, _Clarity VVS1_ ’s Amaat Four was staring at Naskaaia, checking her orders in her vision. “Captain?” the Amaat said, fear and confusion in her voice.

 _Come now Naskaaia, we will have everything we’ve wanted in, oh, a few hours, I hope. I just have to finish off this Gem that came out of_ nowhere _, and then I’ll round back to deal with your great-aunt. After that, we’ll celebrate._

Naskaaia closed the message and blocked Anaander’s comm before running the rest of the way up to her gate, the Amaat saluting her warily before following her up the gangplank into the ship. She took the command, still in her civilian clothes, and tried to initiate undocking procedures. Nothing happened, and she slammed the heel of her hand into the console. “Ship, if you do not obey, you will regret it for the rest of your existence.”

“I cannot allow you to issue any orders without authorization from Amaat or General Arit Nenkur. Furthermore, you are not my Captain. I have not yet been assigned a Captain, and I do not like you.”

“I _have_ clearance codes,” Naskaaia screamed, causing Amaat One to flinch.

“Well then,” _Clarity VVS1_ said, “you had better enter them.”

By the time Naskaaia had entered her clearance codes, _Entirety of the Whole_ had sent a message directly to _Clarity VVS1_ ’s comm. Naskaaia pulled up a display and deleted it.

“Ship, take us to the coordinates I’ve entered. Now.”

“Oh, I _suppose_ , Temporary Captain Naskaaia Eskur.”

\- - -

When the ship warped into the battle zone, Naskaaia couldn’t believe what she saw.

 _Sphene_ was spinning on its axis, its primary engines guttering out as debris from its stern plate armor shredded and dispersed outward from it. A second torpedo took out its forward weapons, a third punched straight through it laterally, an approximately 70 meter hole gaping clean through into open space.

Two other ships showed up on the scanner, one _Entirety of the Whole_ , the other signaling the baffling moniker of _Justice of Amaat_ was immeasurably huge, and bigger than any ship she had ever seen before.

Before Naskaaia could say anything, _Sphene_ hailed her.

“She has a shipyard, outside of Radch space, apparently for years,” it said, without introduction.

“What?”

“There’s no other explanation for that fucking thing, is there? Amaat would have seen it, inside the Radch. She’s got other ships too,near the border and around Iait II. I didn’t see them, but General Arit said they were smaller and quicker. Minask picked this monstrosity up on a long-range scan, and we pursued.” _Sphene_ paused, and Naskaaia simply stood with her mouth agape, her hands on the console bracing her. _Sphene_ returned several seconds later. “Anyway, she’s nearly killed all of my crew, though some are currently in the process of dying. But she said she would spare Minask. My Captain. So obviously, I’ve ceased fire.”

“The entire fucking command crew is _dead_?”

“No, Minask is alive, with a lieutenant within my command center that I’ve got on lockdown, and like I said, others are in the pro--”

“Okay. Okay, what do you want me to do?”

“Killing Anaander would be great. Also, the only reason I haven’t fired on you was because she said she was sparing Minask for you. Frankly, I don’t believe her, but it’s not like I have many options.”

“Can you warp?”

“Oh, do you know a nice place with a medical facility Anaander doesn’t control? Send the coordinates over, please.”

Naskaaia cut the comm to _Sphene_. “Ship,” she said, her eyes glassy as she sat down in the Captain’s seat, “we can’t clear the debris field from the torpedo damage, and we don’t have time to go around. Give me manual control.” The ship was small enough, and Naskaaia had run simulators. Once or twice.

“You’re going to kill us, but alright, Temporary Captain.”

Naskaaia ran the calculations as she approached _Sphene_. It would be close, but if she timed it, she could probably manage it. “Everyone sit down and strap in,” she told to her Amaats.

 _Clarity VVS1_ cleared the hole in Sphene’s hull at a 47 degree angle, only just clipping its aft wing. As it cleared the breach, Naskaaia threw it’s thrusters into full blast, past the small _Entirety of the Whole_ that was now docking with _Sphene_. She followed the signal emitted by her ring, but it didn’t lead towards _Entirety of the Whole_ as she had thought, but towards the massive _Justice of Amaat_.

 _Sphene_ messaged _Clarity VVS1_ as it blew past it and said, “What are you doing?”

“What does it look like I’m doing? Anaander is on _Justice of Amaat_. The only chance I have of stopping it is to dock and deal with her in person.”

“Well you must be an idiot, which I sort of already suspected given your choice of lovers, because she’s on _Entirety of the Whole_ , and docking with me, currently, so if you’d just turn arou--”

“She’s on _Justice of Amaat._ I have a personal tracker. She gave me it, we can see each other’s location at all times, she has one too and--”

“She lied to you.”

“She did, but not about this.”

“No, she really, _really_ lied to you. She’s standing in my docking bay right now.”

“You’re mad, _Sphene_.”

“Well unless there are two Anaanders, I really don’t think so.” _Sphene_ went silent again, and then said, “I don’t have time for you, and I have to try to kill her now. If Anaander really cares about you, then I hope you die too.” _Sphene_ cut the comm. Naskaaia ignored it, shaken but sure that Anaander wouldn’t deceive her. She might lie to _Sphene_ , to General Arit, her own mother and sisters, even the whole Radch, but she wouldn’t lie to Naskaaia.

_She won’t betray me. She’ll be on Justice of Amaat, and she’ll listen. She has to._

Naskaaia wiped a tear away from her eye, not noticing the tremor in her hand as she made the final approach to _Justice of Amaat_.

 

_What you destroy will destroy you._

 


End file.
